56_Ace - ..as my father would say, that looks perfectly usable! Seriously though I imagine you are not the first person to try to recreate these bags, a search through the archives might be fruitful. I'd certainly like a copy of the patterns if it gets that far. I know a company that could reproduce these in Romford London, which made my Ace hood, let me know if you'd like more details shared, they are cost effective, but you'll need to brief them face to face.
I don't have the Rinsey Mills book with me now, but I think the picture of the original hood bag would suggest it's got a bit more form to the large sides (i.e. not just the oval ends), almost box like, I wonder if there is supposed to be more form inside.
BEX316 - nice bags, do you have any idea what the two loops with lift-dot fasteners are designed to secure to?