True story by an English guy stopped for DUI

[A-Snake]

The English guy lives near Le Bugue in the Dordogne and at the time he was stopped he was as drunk as a skunk!
   
   The gendarme signals to him to wind down the window then asks him if he has been drinking, and with a slurring speech the English guy replies; 'Yes, this morning I was at my (hic)..daughter's wedding, and as I don't like church much I went to the cafe opposite and had several beers.'
   'Then during the wedding banquet I seem to remember downing three great bottles of wine; (hic)... A corbieres, a Minervois and (hic)...a Faugeres.'
   'Then to finish off during the celebrations.... And (hic) during the evening ...me and my mate downed two bottles of Johnny Walker's black label.'
   Getting impatient the gendarme warns him; 'Do you understand I'm a policeman and have stopped you for an alcohol test'?
    The Englishman with a grin on his face replies; 'Do you understand that I'm English, like my car, and that my wife is sitting in the other seat, at the steering wheel?'

[French Frie]

[] ... the only incredible thing is... that the gendarme was able to speak english [)] !

[jbottini]

Beautiful!

[rstainer]

This true story, which I first heard over 40 years ago, is as old as the breathalyser/alcotest/whatever.
   
   I wonder who wrote the script, complete with carefully observed hics?

[rstainer]

What about a white van and French-speaking police in snappy blousons, not short-sleeve shirts:
   
   ConDrôle d'alcoolémie : Histoire véritablement drôle rapportée par un Anglais pur French qui réside entre Le Bugue et Les Eyzies en Dordogne ^^
   Le gars dans la voiture est saoul mais au taquet.
   Un policier arrête la voiture, se présente à l'individu et lui demande :
   - Vous avez bu ?
   Avec une élocution pâteuse, le gars répond :
   - Oui, ... ce matin ... j'ai marié ma fille ... et comme je n'aime pas les messes, ... je suis allé au café et j'ai bu ... quelques bières. Puis ..... pendant le banquet ..... j'ai essoré 3 bonnes bouteilles .... une de Corbières ... une de Minervois ..... et .... une de Faugères.
   Pour finir .... pendant la fête ... dans la soirée ... deux bouteilles de whisky ..... Johnny Walker .... étiquette noire.
   
   
   Finalement le policier, irrité, lui dit :
   - Avez-vous compris que je suis policier et que je vous ai arrêté pour un contrôle de l'alcoolémie ?
   Le "british" lui répond alors :
   - Et vous .... savez-vous que .... cette voiture est ... anglaise et ..... que c'est ..ma femme ... qui conduit !